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Results of Questionnaire How People Use the Web Revision - Thorough Review

The results of this questionnaire are available to anybody.

This questionnaire was open from 2021-12-01 to 2022-01-04.

12 answers have been received.

Jump to results for question:

  1. Introduction and Purpose
  2. Review level
  3. How People with Disabilities Use the Web overview page
  4. Stories of Web Users overview page
  5. Alex, reporter with repetitive strain injury
  6. Blair, autistic data entry clerk injury
  7. Ilya, senior staff member who is blind
  8. Lee, online shopper with color vision deficiency
  9. Luis, basketball fan with Down syndrome
  10. Martine, older adult student who is hard of hearing
  11. Noor, teenager who is deaf and blind
  12. Preety, middle school student with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and dyslexia
  13. Yun, retiree with low vision, hand tremor, and mild short-term memory loss
  14. Diverse Abilities and Barriers
  15. Tools and Techniques
  16. Additional comments

1. Introduction and Purpose

The following is a thorough, monkey review survey for specific parts of the WAI resource called How People with Disabilities Use the Web. Specifically, we welcome comments on the current draft of:

  • How People with Disabilities Use the Web overview page
  • Stories of Web Users overview page

    • In addition, please review the following profiles of the users:

    For background on purpose and scope of this work, please check the 2020 Update Project Page.

    Please complete a thorough review and comment in the below boxes or open a GitHub issue. This is expected to be a "last call" for this resource. We would like to resolve all major comments with this round of review. Thank you!

    Details

    Responder Introduction and Purpose
    Laura Keen
    Kris Anne Kinney
    Kimberly Patch
    Vicki Menezes Miller
    Carlos Duarte
    Jennifer Chadwick No comments other than I am excited to see these pages have been embellished with clear descriptions of needs, the why and then related examples in plain language.
    Julie Rawe Most of my comments below are relatively minor, but two are major:
    (1) The two overview pages that have a "Section Contents" subheading are confusing. It's hard to figure out the different sections fit together on those overview pages.
    (2) The "Cognitive, learning, and neurological" page has several areas of concern. Please see box #14 for details.
    Sharron Rush
    Shawn Lawton Henry
    Sylvie Duchateau
    Michele Williams One global issue I'm having trouble with is the point-of-view of the barriers in the opening paragraphs of the "Stories of Web Users". Are we writing these from the perspective of the actual person's thoughts or someone observing that person? I think the current text jumps between these 2 styles of writing so we should resolve that.

    Then, is this supposed to be non-technical (like most of our personas) or technical? For example, our personas would say something like, "Persona X knows to use Tab to navigate a page but sometimes can't see where they are and it jumps around the page in a way that's unexpected". A non-specialist wouldn't know to say "The visual focus is missing on webpages as they navigate and doesn't move in a logical order" - though this makes sense if we say we're interjecting commentary from a technical observer perspective. I vote that we either explain or completely strip out the WCAG jargon so beginners can follow along and associate the technical jargon (which they can learn later) with the actual effect, but understand if this is meant to educate people on those principles.

    This also leads me to ask what's the overall reading level we're trying to achieve with these resources (and is there a standard way W3C evaluates this)?

    Lastly, I'm not sure if presenting the barriers in the paragraphs is supposed to encourage people to do better or just build empathy. Sometimes barriers are just presented almost like cliffhangers ("Persona X has trouble with this") versus something the reader can help control ("Persona X has trouble when this happens and benefits from sites that do Y"). Given the stories end with related links to WCAG it seems to me we want to guide people to barriers that are actionable for the reader. However, this currently isn't always the case for either direction (as noted on the individual stories) and could use resolution.

    One additional note since my first submission - along with creating a common pattern for each persona once the group is clear on the goals, I think we need to be mindful that these should be empowering of the people represented. Sometimes it can feel like these are written by nondisabled people who want the reader to pity the condition of the disabled persona; instead the tone should read as if anyone wrote it (disabled or not) and reinforce the "social model" that the personas are fully capable but disabled by the conditions of technology not built with accessibility in mind.
    Lisa Seeman-Horwitz It is a good draft, but from my perspective it still needs a few rounds to become ready to publish.

2. Review level

What level of review did you do?

Summary

ChoiceAll responders
Results
I thoroughly reviewed the materials. 6
I skimmed them. 2
I need more time and will review by the date provided below. 2
I didn't get to it and will not in the near future. I abstain from providing comment. 1

Details

Responder Review level
Laura Keen I thoroughly reviewed the materials.
Kris Anne Kinney I skimmed them. Going through it as i can. will probably submit it a few times to save my comments.
Kimberly Patch thoroughly reviewed Alex
Vicki Menezes Miller I thoroughly reviewed the materials.
Carlos Duarte I didn't get to it and will not in the near future. I abstain from providing comment.
Jennifer Chadwick I skimmed them.
Julie Rawe I thoroughly reviewed the materials.
Sharron Rush I thoroughly reviewed the materials.
Shawn Lawton Henry I need more time and will review by the date provided below. So sorry to need to ask for more time. (I have a good reason, though.)
Sylvie Duchateau I thoroughly reviewed the materials. Still reviewing, ... completed the reading of introduction. Will do more soon.
Michele Williams I thoroughly reviewed the materials. Submitting multiple times
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz I need more time and will review by the date provided below.

3. How People with Disabilities Use the Web overview page

Please focus on How People with Disabilities Use the Web overview page.

4. Stories of Web Users overview page

Please focus on Stories of Web Users overview page. Note that what is to be used for images is still under discussion

  • Is there anything missing from the introduction?
  • Is the structure and summary presentation of stories helpful?
  • Are there any additional WAI resources that could be presented here? Should these resources be presented in the parent overview page?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Stories of Web Users overview page
Laura Keen Blair, autistic data entry clerk injury - In progress text needs to be replaced

other than the overview page looks good.

Kris Anne Kinney "Note: The following scenarios are not real people. They do not address every kind of disability." - to cover the comments made by some people, without getting too wordy, could we add a sentence after "They do not address every kind of disability". to add something about the "non-comprehensive" nature of the stories? Like: They can not address every challenge faced either. I know we try to have a VERY wide range, but not every scenario can be mentioned or this resource would be unusable.

I like the three resources at the bottom of the page!
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Looks good in general.


Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe Three comments about this overview page and a fourth comment about the formatting on all of the individual story pages:
(1) Consider adding a third sentence to the note near the top of this page: "Note: The following scenarios are not real people. They do not address every kind of disability. [ADD: This selection of use cases/personas can help developers and designers remove a broad range of accessibility barriers.]"
(2) The last section ("Related WAI resources") has a typo: "These other resources provide [DELETE: additional] more detailed information regarding user needs within specific contexts or disability areas."
(3) Yun summary: The last sentence uses an idiom that does not appear in his full story. Here's a suggestion on how to replace the idiom with literal/concrete language: "[CHANGE "The final straw was" to "He knew he needed to retire"] when he developed a mild hand tremor and found it difficult to maintain the precision required in his line of work."
(4) Three global comments about the template for the individual story pages:
(4A) In the note below the summary, the first sentence is about multiple people and the second sentence is about a single person. I suggest making both sentences about a single person: "Note: The following [CHANGE "scenarios are not real people" to "scenario is not about a real person"]. It may not address every person with this disability."
(4B) The order of the sections: If you move "Barrier examples" up to the 2nd section, after "About [Person's Name]," then you can have the two sections on how to help ("Assistive technologies and adaptive strategies used" and "Related WAI resources") be listed consecutively.
(4C) "Barrier examples" section has a lot of "I" statements. Should these "I" statements be inside quotation marks?
Sharron Rush Seems fine
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams I like the short introduction but often want it to detail how these stories were gathered and, thus, how to read them. That is, are these representative of typical people, a cumulation of several people, etc.? As a specialist, I sometimes want these to actually be edge cases that dismantle stereotypes and misunderstandings (e.g., an adult with ADHD rather than middle school student to dispel thinking people grow out of having it). However, if there's something explicit in that "Note" section to reinforce these are meant to be typical that would help. For example, "The following scenarios are not real people, but represent real experiences of people with the conditions highlighted. They do not address every kind of disability or all impacts of a certain disability."

The summaries should be consistent. Some start with a disability (e.g., "Ilya is blind.") versus an accolade (e.g., "Alex has worked as a reporter for more than 20 years."). Then some highlight AT (e.g., Noor's magnification) but not others (e.g., Preety who doesn't seem to use anything). Lastly, some highlight barriers (e.g., Lee's story), but others do not (like Martine who doesn't seem to have any barriers). I highly recommend a common structure that will keep each person on equal footing (e.g., doesn't make Alex feel more accomplished than Ilya) and allows easier skimming/comprehension. Perhaps an opening statement with name, disability, and how they spend their day, then a second statement about how they'd like to use the computer but how barriers might arise in that. For example, "Alex developed a repetitive strain injury while working as a reporter for more than 20 years. While using a mouse is still possible, it's painful after extended periods of time so he benefits from websites that also work with keyboard-only navigation and voice control."

Luis and Noor need occupations; currently it feels out of place and, particularly for Luis, a bit degrading to just call them "basketball fan" and "teenager" rather than "reporter", "data entry clerk", or even "retiree". Even just saying "student" I think would work, or "non-profit volunteer" -- something that describes how they spend their day. I think it's fine to use leisure activities in the personas but (for whatever it's worth) the current strategy has seemed to value occupations in the descriptions so we don't want to reinforce stereotypes and, particularly for Down Syndrome, I fear this will give the wrong impression about capabilities.

I like having the "Related WAI Resources" here (it's a much better placement than the Overview Page). However, I don't think these are the right pages to link. Each resource goes to a seemingly technical W3C-style document where I think people coming to this page could benefit from staying within Accessibility Fundamentals pages that are more curated and less frightening (smile). Also, it's jarring to have 2 specific disabilities listed (low vision and cognitive impairments) without any type of acknowledgement of why those 2 and why not others. I think the resources currently on the Overview Page seem very appropriate here and the current objects in the list might be better suited elsewhere where people may be looking for more detailed technical help.
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz

5. Alex, reporter with repetitive strain injury

Please focus on Alex, reporter with repetitive strain injury.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Alex, reporter with repetitive strain injury
Laura Keen Introduction to Alex - needs to be replaced.

Note: The following scenario is not a real person. It may not address every person with this disability.

I'm wondering if the summary is actually needed? Maybe just the disclaimer note at the top?

The rest of the content for Alex works well.
Kris Anne Kinney "I have an option to save progress and take a break when completing long, multi-step forms". - should this be multi-page form? Just thinking of some of the long forms that I've had to fill out for things like government clearance and having the ability to save that as you're going through is vital.
Kimberly Patch Still problems with this user – detailed comments in Github
https://github.com/w3c/wai-people-use-web/issues/111
Vicki Menezes Miller The following note on the top of user story does feel quite right.

"Note: The following scenario is not a real person. It may not address every person with this disability."

Suggestion:
Note: The following scenario does not relate to a real person and does not address every aspect of this kind of disability.
Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush comments in GitHub
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams Like the opening quote and overall story. However, as noted by my overarching comments, I think the point-of-view needs resolution as well as the purpose of each barrier and AT mentioned (is it just for education, empathy building, to spur an action, etc.).

Regarding the current structure, I think the story should keep all the keyboard "stuff" together so each paragraph has a portion identified by the opening sentence for ease of reading. Right now the third paragraph extends talking about keyboard navigation which feels out place. Here's a suggested rewrite of the first few paragraphs:
"Alex has worked as a reporter for more than 20 years. He recently developed a repetitive strain injury in his hands and wrists making it painful to use a mouse and type for extended periods of time. Because of this Alex has found severals ways to use a mouse less.

Alex uses an ergonomic keyboard to navigate around web pages and has found that this helps alleviate the pain associated with using the mouse. On most pages he can use keys like Tab and Enter to move around and make selections, and finds it really helpful when a page has keyboard-friendly features like a link that skips past the top navigation sections. However, he's found on some sites he can't see which field or link he is on, he moves around in the page in an order that is not logical to how the page is laid out, or it's missing that really helpful skip navigation link. When this happens he has to use his mouse again, making his injury worse. He's even started limiting his research options to avoid sites that are too difficult to use."

For the speech recognition portion, it's not accurate that links need to be "meaningful" to work. That is, if the text is simply "click here" speech recognition still works. Rather, links simply need to be visually identifiable (so you know it's a link that you can activate without moving a mouse over the words) as well as coded as links (as is already mentioned). Additionally, in this paragraph it's not sure what the reader should come away with learning in hearing that Alex is new to this software and has to continually learn it. It's good to point out that people are not experts as their AT but it's not clear currently what a reader should do with this nugget of information (or that that's even the point they're supposed to walk away with).
I would update that paragraph as follows:
"Alex has started using speech control software which helps him to avoid using the mouse and keyboard all together. It is early days though and he is not sure of how to use all the features. He does know the software allows him to "click" on links by speaking, but noticed he doesn't always know something is a link by just looking at the page, and then sometimes speaking the link text simply doesn't work. He really benefits from links with visual features like underline and that are coded for more than just a mouse click. The software also has a speech-to-text dictation feature that is really helpful to avoid typing but is hard to use for someone used to typing on a keyboard for so many years. He's hopeful his speed will improve and he'll keep learning new features, but really benefits from people understanding the new technology may mean some things move a little slower as he learns to get thoughts out of his head in a different way."

The last paragraph about mobile devices feels like it has a lot of jargon and falls short compared to the other paragraphs. Here's a suggestion:
"Outside of work, Alex finds his mobile phone much easier to use than the computer. Mobile-friendly websites and apps often have less options to navigate through, allow using just his finger to tap the screen which is much easier on his wrists, and allow finding a more comfortable position for holding the phone. He wishes his employer would create a mobile-friendly site that he could use for his job; currently their pages are not responsive and thus he would have to zoom and scroll to see everything and make his selections which just isn't practical."
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz

6. Blair, autistic data entry clerk injury

Please focus on Blair, autistic data entry clerk injury.
**Note that Blair will benefit from much more detailed input as this is a new persona rather than a rewrite.**

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Blair, autistic data entry clerk injury
Laura Keen Same comment about the Summary as I had with Alex.

Quote: "on on" doesn't work. Suggest "If there is a large amount of text [or content] on a page..."
If there is a lot going on on a page I find it very hard to focus. Especially if there is audio or video that starts without me doing anything.

The rest of the profile for Blair looks good.

Kris Anne Kinney
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller For me, I still feel that this user story would benefit from not using "they" and "their" pronouns. I personally feel that the user story becomes less clear with the usage of these pronouns. Maybe the paragraphs could be re-written to avoid repeating the name "Blair" at every replacement of they, their, them.

Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush Was Blair's choice of gender neutral pronoun their own choice? If so, may want to state that. Otherwise seems a bit arbitrary - imposed by the author.
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams For now my only comment (outside of the gender ID discussion we already had) is that we need to be clear what we're trying to call out here. Right now it seems to tip-toe about plain language and following steps but doesn't feel sure. I haven't worked within autism spaces a great deal to be of much help here, however.
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz blair is much better! However I think it still needs some small changes and review by COGA> The barries are only examples, but too many steps, too many errors ,unclear instructions and barriers to entry can leave him shaking for hours!

7. Ilya, senior staff member who is blind

Please focus on Ilya, senior staff member who is blind.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Ilya, senior staff member who is blind
Laura Keen Same comment about Summary as above. Alternately you may want to use the short descriptions from: https://deploy-preview-113--wai-people-use-web.netlify.app/people-use-web/user-stories/

Persona content for Ilya looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney I feel like the last two paragraphs should be combined in some way. The "outside of work" should go before the 2nd paragraph where you start talking about her other interests and challenges besides work.
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Typo:
This is particularly bad for presentations as they are often filed with images that colleagues don’t include alternative text for.
"filed" should be "filled".

Suggestion to modify the sentence:
This is particularly bad in the case of presentations as they are often filled with images, for which alternative text has not been added.

(Is there a very purposeful need to mention colleagues that didn't include alternative text?)

In the paragraph with "CAPTCHA", is the "a" necessary here: "do have a CAPTCHA as part of the login in process"
Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush Awkward ungrammatical sentences:
1. This is particularly bad for presentations as they are often filed [typo] with images that colleagues don’t include alternative text for.
2. She has also found online communities that she can find out new ideas from.
Suggested:
1. Presentation authors, for example, often neglect to include alternative text descriptions of the images in their slides.
2. She has also gotten new ideas from online communities she has found.

(very mild) suggestion to avoid repetition of "diverse staff with diverse abilities" with a change to "diverse staff with a range of abilities."
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams This comment applies across all of the personas - The "Summary" section looks like a typo where it simply says, "Introduction to Ilya" followed by the Note. Is this supposed to be filled in? Perhaps by the information from the Overview page? If not then it's not necessary and I highly recommend removing it so the page can be more streamlined. The Note can be moved elsewhere.

Also applying to each persona, the "Note" that these aren't real people and may not address every person isn't helpful. It would be better to explain how a reader should interpret these stories (similar to my concerns about the Note on the Overview page). That is, why do we have these personas in the first place, how are they compiled, and what are readers supposed to walk away with after reading these? I'm not really clear on any of these points.

Regarding Ilya, unfortunately I see a lot of issues with this one and think it needs a re-write. Overall in many places it's too vague on what issues Ilya is experiencing which sometimes give the wrong impressions that things are completely unusable (e.g., CAPTCHAs - which can be made more accessible for blind folks with audio reCAPTCHA), or that some things will be too hard to blind people to use simply by nature of complexity (e.g., complex Web applications). Additionally, with the way issues are stated, readers don't have a sense that the barriers are preventable or what makes it preventable (e.g., what makes a chat function in a video conference tool not work). Lastly, it's not clear why "zoom" is mentioned in the last paragraph. Does Ilya have some usable vision? If so, this would also appear on desktop (where the screen is much larger).

More specifically to each section, I don't care for the opening quote, particularly saying "because the accessibility and screen reader are built-in". That's an odd phrasing that may make it seem like accessibility doesn't include a screen reader or, inversely, that screen readers are somehow separate from other considerations. Also, technically a MacBook has the same screen reader built-in (and all the other settings) so it's not really accurate to call out mobile phones in this way. I presume we're talking about how most blind folks use a Windows PC and JAWS for work versus an iPhone for personal use but that's insider knowledge that these readers won't have. Overall I'm not sure what this persona is trying to convey.

I won't go into more details because it may not be worth the time to type it all out. Just suffice it to say every section (About thru Related Principles) feels disjointed and like a random selection of issues when it should feel more like a cohesive story of the most common issues. If we want to point out that screen reader compatibility is among the most complex to accomplish, I think we can simply say that without selecting seemingly random barriers and guidelines to call out (as in, "Ilya is aware that most web applications focus on the visual presentation and mouse movement so unfortunately she has come to expect running into issues on each new site and application she visits. The most common barriers she needs to overcome include...")

More minor note - why is Ilya a "senior staff member" and not simply a "[principle] accountant"? I would also remove the word "chief" and replace with "senior" or "principle".
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz

8. Lee, online shopper with color vision deficiency

Please focus on Lee, online shopper with color vision deficiency.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Lee, online shopper with color vision deficiency
Laura Keen We're using 2 different spellings for color [colour] is this intended?

Remaining persona content looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney "filling out the shopping cart forms" - is that a universal way to refer to "check out"? Something like "Sometimes, completing the check-out process is tricky.... etc." But again, I don't know if "check out" is a US-centric term. ... and then I read the story and you do use the term check out, so I think you should also use that in the quote.
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Quote: "I often miss items on sale because it is hard for me to spot the red labels used to show those things. Sometimes filling out the shopping cart forms is tricky because if I leave something out they show it in red and it’s hard for me to see it."

Suggestion to replace "things" and make the problem more clear, as follows:
"I often miss items on sale because it is hard for me to spot the red labels used to indicate them. Sometimes filling out the shopping cart form is tricky because if I overlook a field, I get an error or warning message in red and it’s hard for me to see the message".
(Just a suggestion, no strong feelings."

Next paragraph, second sentence:
Current: "Lee was born with deuteranopia and protanopia (often called “color blindness”). He has difficulty distinguishing among items that are red, green, orange, and brown, all of which appear kind of a murky brown."
Suggestion to change "all of which appear kind of a murky brown" to "all of which appear to him as a kind of murky brown"

Typo:
"He’s noticed lately" should be "He noticed lately" (remove apostrophe 's').

Typo:
"Lee plays in a various fantasy football leagues" should be "Lee plays in various fantasy football leagues." (remove "a" before "various").


Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush I find myself vaguely annoyed by the tortured language. I have tried to go with the group on this one, but it stops me every time. Can't we just come down on the side of common usage? Suggest to use "color blindness" in headline and make the distinction in the text but not make a major issue of what is common usage and much more direct language. Otherwise this is good.
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams Lee's profile falls flat to me. I'm not diminishing the impacts of these conditions but for the story in its current state I wonder if it's even necessary, especially when it comes after other stories that are longer and pull in more/varied WCAG items. If Lee stays, I wonder if someone with these conditions can come up with more examples than just "required fields" or better express what life is like (e.g., "I don't feel disabled until XX happens" or "I can use location on a stop light, and shape on a stop sign, but..."). It's not very believable that they can't see a sale price given the current patterns I've seen on the web and I don't want these stories to be dismissed by readers.

Also, I've not kept up with all the statements in GitHub about "color blindness" but I do know some people felt like this isn't something we should try to tackle. As it stands, Lee's disability description in the title is getting to be longer than the paragraphs about them. I think keeping "red-green color blindness" in the title then a description of it in the paragraphs should suffice.
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz

9. Luis, basketball fan with Down syndrome

Please focus on Luis, basketball fan with Down syndrome.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Luis, basketball fan with Down syndrome
Laura Keen Luis is keen to get a job but worries that the jargon will make this initially difficulty. Replace "difficulty" with "difficult".

Remaining persona content looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney "Luis is keen to get a job but worries that the jargon will make this initially difficulty". This initial sentence is hitting strange each time I read it. Luis is keen to get a job but worries that industry jargon or workplace jargon or job-related jargon... I feel like jargon needs to be described as what kind of jargon. I also think the end of the sentence should state "difficult at first." because hopefully, he would eventually get used to it and I also think its more plain that way. If simple language is something Luis needs, we should be sure his persona is in plain language too.
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Quote: "I like when I buy tickets for home games because I know the site. When I have to buy away game tickets it is hard. All the different sites do things in different ways."
Suggestion to modify: "I like to buy tickets for home games because I know the site well. When I have to buy "away game" tickets it is hard for me. All the different sites do things in different ways.

There is a reference to "jargon". Should it be tied up with something.. jargon about what, jargon about the company on the web site or ?
"Luis is keen to get a job but worries that the jargon will make this initially difficulty. Writing in “plain language” is really helpful. "
Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe (1) Is Luis an adult? If so, is it common to describe an adult as having a "cognitive delay" or is that wording more commonly used to describe a child?
(2) I suggest changing this sentence to avoid using non-literal language: "If something can be said using simpler terminology or shorter sentences, that [CHANGE "is a plus" to "makes it easier for him to understand and use the information"]."
Sharron Rush no comments, all looks fine
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams As mentioned, I think Luis needs a more descriptive title like "job seeker" or "vocational student".

The tone of this one doesn't feel like a person with Down syndrome's own voice writing this but rather a person trying to write about Down syndrome. Here's where I have some difficulty with personas/stories not coming from actual data (larger point as a UX Researcher who isn't always keen on these types of representations). Nevertheless, I think we can restate some things so they don't sound too patronizing and overcome any bias/pity a reader may have when they come to this story; for instance, saying Luis learned "basic computer skills" seems like it could just say "computer skills". Overall I think we can reinforce that Luis lives an independent young adult life, though he may rely more on routine and simplification of tasks than some others (though it seems everyone benefits from things being less complicated at the end of the day) -- something like that.

I don't care for the opening quote - it doesn't make sense that (1) Luis would be frequently buying tickets to games outside of his city and (2) that he would need to go to a different site to do this. Generally in the U.S. people buy tickets from a central hub (e.g., companies like StubHub or TicketMaster) - is this not the case other places? Nevertheless, I don't think the focus should be on basketball but rather on things like simplified language and easy to follow paths through websites.

It's not clear to me how "jargon" might impede Luis's job hunt. If anything else, the cluttered job websites might be more to blame (the way the basketball sites are described). Or perhaps not understanding all the steps involved in applying and interviewing (or even which sites help start the process)?

I like the idea of the basketball site to bring in some leisure activity and not just work, but I think other barriers are more realistic like form fields that are hard to understand (or resolve an error on) and the countdown timer ticket sites usually display. I don't care for the statement that says, "Especially confusing is when he clicks on a link and ends up in a PDF file" because that doesn't help the reader understand what to make of this type of barrier (e.g., should we not use PDFs, how else will he get a printable ticket for the game, etc.).

If you want to bring in mobile, perhaps this can talk about how it was hard to buy tickets on the computer because of the extra fields, the visual layout of the page, and not feeling comfortable saving personal information on a device other people might use. With the mobile app, Luis can save his information more easily and it asks fewer questions with a more focused screen and set of steps. Then his ticket is put into the app rather than emailed or having to be printed so he doesn't have to go searching for it later.

The related resources seem to be okay but I think the story needs to streamline first before revisiting those.
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz Have people with DS contributed to this? what do they like best that make websites easyer for them?
Probably good icons and images that let them know that things are. Less text.

10. Martine, older adult student who is hard of hearing

Please focus on Martine, older adult student who is hard of hearing.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Martine, older adult student who is hard of hearing
Laura Keen Auto-captioning can be useful for her bit it can also cause her problems if it’s available but incorrect. Replace "bit" with "but".

Remaining persona content looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Quote: "Most people don’t realise that sign language is a completely different language. I can read text but it is hard as I am always translating from my native language."
Not sure that the second sentence explains sufficiently the problem.

Stylistic suggestion to "Martine spends a lot of her free time watching streamed content on video streaming services. The improvement in captioning on these services in recent years has meant she is able to watch more programmes than she was before."

Martine spends a lot of her free time watching streamed content on video streaming services. The improvement in captioning of these services in recent years has meant that she is able to watch more programmes than she was before."
Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush typo corrected in Github

Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams This one doesn't make sense at all because Martine is described as "hard of hearing" but also a native signer. That would generally be called "deaf" (or even capital D "Deaf" if they are part of the Deaf culture in the U.S.).

For the opening quote I'll ask what someone is supposed to take away from a statement that it's hard to translate text and signing? You can make people aware that the 2 are different but with some conclusion to it - like it's helpful when people offer signing at events, not just captions??

This phrase is hard to understand: "has audio tracks over imagery" - I would say something more simple like "sometimes it's just a person narrating but they're not on-screen" or something like that.

I've never seen captions that are color coded to identify who is speaking - that seems hard to follow as opposed to just putting their names (if it's not the person currently on-screen).

The last sentence (about written content) is just confusing.

The AT resources list "transcripts" (and text alternatives for non-text content) but it's not clear from the story why (as opposed to just listing "captions" that is).

I think the group could stand to pull from a post by Meryl Evans about real considerations on the Web for deaf folks: https://www.linkedin.com/posts/meryl_accessibility-a11y-merylmots-activity-6862432161308426241-xk_z/
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz

11. Noor, teenager who is deaf and blind

Please focus on Noor, teenager who is deaf and blind.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Noor, teenager who is deaf and blind
Laura Keen Under Related Resources:
Check: Image text alternatives (“alt text” is missing a closing parenthesis ")"

Remaining persona content looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney I sent this persona to a friend and former colleague to get her feedback. As soon as I get anything from her, I'll let you know.
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Quote: "I love watching videos and when they have captions that I can make large, I can follow the dialogue."
Small suggestion: "I love watching videos and when they have captions that I can make large, I can then follow the dialogue."

First sentence: "Noor is a teenager who was born deaf and with typical vision."
Should this be "atypical vision"?

Typo: Second paragraph: Replace " by here device." with " by her device."

Typo: "The shopping website I use has the same layout on all of it’s sections " should be "its sections".

Editorial: some of the "Problem" and "Works well" scenarios end with a full stop, some don't. Perhaps add full stops where they are missing for consistency.





Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush Not sure why but this was jarring: "Noor is a teenager who was born deaf and with typical vision. She recently became legally blind too."

Maybe: Noor is a teenager who was born deaf and with typical vision. Over time, however, she has lost vision due to retinal disease. She is now legally blind as well.
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams The opening quote is jarring when you're expecting a more typically deaf-blind person who wouldn't watch multimedia. It also doesn't seem to have much to do with the rest of the story.

How does Noor use sign language? Does she need to be up-close, have high contrast (e.g., a signer in a black shirt), switch to using tactile sign language, etc.?

It's kind of hard to believe that a teen who only recently became "legally blind" is going to be proficient in Braille and use a Braille device. The beginning of her story with the Braille display also doesn't match the ending where she rides the bus and zooms her phone to follow a route. If she can see enough to use magnification then why stop to learn Braille and buy a (very expensive) device for it?

If we keep the Braille device, I would explain more about what an electronic Braille device is and how it helps Noor. I usually describe how it translates text into Braille characters, and the dots pop up and down accordingly along a row. (I see from further reading that it's more like a BrailleNote computer, but that still warrants more explanation for readers.)

Is "fashion history" an actual, realistic major in college? Also, if we're trying to break down biases then you might want to help explain why someone nearly blind would want to study fashion - e.g., "she's always been interested in clothes and her decreasing vision only fueled her passion more for vibrant colors, exaggerated shapes, and distinctive textures".

As mentioned, I have trouble with how we're stating barriers like "She has had problems in the past being able to submit coursework because the form buttons weren’t recognised by here device." (Firstly, there's a typo with "here" and also "recognised" is the non-U.S. spelling.) Regardless, this doesn't seem helpful -- it doesn't go far enough to either explain how that barrier would effect Noor to build empathy for the situation or explain why her device might not work to educate readers on how to properly build their code. I think we need to pick a focus then lean in either way.

The paragraph about using the map is hard to follow and doesn't seem to represent actual map applications which do have written directions, for instance.

Do we really want to go there with "beacons"? This is a big deal in the research world (e.g., ACM ASSETS Conference) but not yet in industry. Also it seems Noor already has a lot of scenarios pointed out (that could use some more content) so doesn't seem necessary to bring in yet another scenario (particularly one that is possibly lessor-known).
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz

12. Preety, middle school student with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and dyslexia

Please focus on Preety, middle school student with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and dyslexia.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Preety, middle school student with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and dyslexia
Laura Keen Looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney "Preety can be easily distracted from tasks when something else captures her interest, making it difficult for her to maintain focus on her work." I think this statement is pretty stereotypical of ADHD (I don't mean this to sound like you think it does, Kevin) rather than go with the easily distracted could you potentially say something like, "she has difficulty following multi-step tasks, which makes it hard to maintain focus during long tasks in school." Or something of that nature. That it's not just "attention distraction", it's keeping track of multi-steps too. Just a thought - I only feel mildly strong about this.
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller
Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe Three comments:
(1) Will the "middle school" detail resonate internationally? Would it be simpler to describe her as "a 12-year-old with ADHD and dyslexia"?
(2) I suggest changing this sentence to avoid giving the impression that people with dyslexia only change background colors when they are really tired: "Sometimes [DELETE: when she is really tired] she uses functionality in her text-to-speech software which allows her to change the page background colour. [ADD: Changing the color is especially helpful when she is really tired.]" 
(3) Why are captions helpful to Preety in particular? Her listening skills are a strength, yes? Are you suggesting that she uses captions in videos the way she uses text-to-speech, so she can see the words in videos as she hears them? Captions help some people with ADHD pay attention but can be distracting to other people with ADHD. I suggest adding a sentence to "About Preety" that explains when/why she uses captions.
Sharron Rush Might this be useful, either here or in another relevant section?
Problem: Complex language and sentence structure are confusing to me and hard to read and retain. Excessive use of acronyms and abbreviations is distracting and I often must reread several times or sometimes just get stuck and give up.
Works well: Use short sentences and plain language as much as possible. Spell out the complete words of an acronym at least the first time it is used. Avoid or explain abbreviations.
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams Like the opening quote here.

This statement needs different phrasing and more explanation "Preety finds visual supports and whitespace helpful for her dyslexia."

The text can be cleaned up here - such as the 2 "distracting" descriptions in this sentence: "Often sites contain distracting content such as animated advertisments and graphics which she can find distracting."

I don't understand what this means: "...with simpler layout and where images or icons are used to help reinforce the meaning of the text."

Overall the content is okay and accurate but written in a way that's hard to read and follow. I also think it could, again, go further to either explain how it feels to run into certain barriers or be able to correct them as a reader. Saying "ends up behind in school" isn't quite impactful enough to me. It may be helpful to even incorporate how and when Preety got diagnosed and what life was like before being able to use tools. Additionally, another barrier might be *being allowed* to use her tools for schoolwork and tests.
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz I think it still needs some small changes and review by COGA> She probably doesn't actually buy that often as she finds the forms to pay confusing and special offers distract her. If she makes too many mistakes coping in her debit card, or registering, she gets tiered and needs to stop.

13. Yun, retiree with low vision, hand tremor, and mild short-term memory loss

Please focus on Yun, retiree with low vision, hand tremor, and mild short-term memory loss.

  • Does the quote and story make sense?
  • Are there any additional barriers that would be useful to include?
  • Are there any additional resources to include or resources to remove?
Please comment below or leave a GitHub issue.

Details

Responder Yun, retiree with low vision, hand tremor, and mild short-term memory loss
Laura Keen Quote: revise text "It is great to be see" to "It's great to see..." and "a bit of the" to "a bit on the..."

"I love all this new technology. It is great to be see my grandchildren. It takes me a bit to find all the controls and sometimes they are a bit of the small side, but I get there in the end."

3rd paragraph second sentence: Remove one of the "now"

He stopped buying physical newspapers and now subscribes to an online version now...

Remaining persona content looks good.
Kris Anne Kinney
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller Quote: "I love all this new technology. It is great to be see my grandchildren. It takes me a bit to find all the controls and sometimes they are a bit of the small side, but I get there in the end."
Suggestion: "I love all this new technology. It is great to see my grandchildren. It takes me a bit of time to find all the controls and sometimes they are slightly on the small side, but I get there in the end."

First paragraph.
Current: "Yun had a long and successful career as an architect. He delayed retirement until he was in his 70’s because work challenged him and as the senior architect in his firm, he was often sought after to mentor the new hires and guest lecture at local universities.

Suggestion: "Yun had a long and successful career as an architect. He delayed retirement until he was in his 70’s because, as the senior architect in his firm, he was often sought after to mentor the new hires and deliver guest lectures at local universities."

Minor edits (a comma added, and "yun" to "Yun"):
Current: Currently, at age 85 Yun’s vision has continued to deteriorate, his hand tremors have gotten worse, and his family has started to notice some short term memory loss. Even so, yun maintains an active interest in the history of architecture and is part of a small group of people who share his passion and write about it online.

Suggested:
Currently, at age 85, Yun’s vision has continued to deteriorate, his hand tremors have gotten worse, and his family has started to notice some short term memory loss. Even so, Yun maintains an active interest in the history of architecture and is part of a small group of people who share his passion and write about it online.


Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick
Julie Rawe I did not have time to give this a close read.
Sharron Rush comments in GitHub
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams The opening quote has typos but is overall a good sentiment.

This one seems to have a more academic tone than the others. If we're going for more simplified writing (which I hope is the case to be more accessible), then I think it can scale down.

The short term memory loss seems to be missing in the barriers - seems like an opportunity to mention something like saving one's place, using breadcrumbs to help him recall where he is on a site, or offering to auto-save login information.

The CAPTCHA section here as well as in the Ilya stories feel forced. It feels like an agenda against using CAPTCHA's instead of an actual barrier these people might experience. These either need to make more sense or be removed as we don't want these to feel like indictments against certain technology just because we have the platform to do so. Notably, for instance, some people find being sent a code just as challenging because it disrupts their thinking and forces them to go look for a phone they may not have near them.

Notably this section has some typos but won't point them out here since that doesn't seem to be the level of review at present.
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz Yun needs work from the cognitive part. I doubt he prefers sites that send him a code that he needs to enter. this is a complex and multi step process and he will transcribe the numbers incorrectly if they are more then 3 digits. He also sometimes copies the previous code as the messages concatenates. Typically he gets shut out of these Web Site

Learning new technology is slower then it used to be so tools need to be intuitive to use

14. Diverse Abilities and Barriers

Please focus on Diverse Abilities and Barriers pages.
Note that this section has not been subject to any editorial changes, it has just been split out into multiple pages.

15. Tools and Techniques

Please focus on Tools and Techniques pages.
Note that this section has not been subject to any editorial changes, it has just been split out into multiple pages.

16. Additional comments

Use this question to include any additional observations or concerns you would like to see addressed.

Details

Responder Additional comments
Laura Keen
Kris Anne Kinney
Kimberly Patch
Vicki Menezes Miller All the user stories, under "Summary" state:

Introduction about xyz.

Is it really necessary? We already have straight under the "Page contents" toc, which says "About xyz", plus a heading "About xyz". I just wondered whether it was really necessary to have this sentence.
Carlos Duarte
Jennifer Chadwick I am familiar with these pages and am very pleased with the updates. I can't wait to share them.
Julie Rawe I am a relatively new member of the COGA TF. In box #14, I included 5 comments about the "Cognitive, learning, and neurological" page, but I also recommend having with the entire COGA TF review this page and any subsequent versions for accuracy, clarity, and tone, thank you!
Sharron Rush Is this a placeholder "Introduction about Luis" Is there meant to be into text in these sentences at the top of each page?
Shawn Lawton Henry
Sylvie Duchateau
Michele Williams These stories are a good idea but currently miss the mark in a lot of places - readability, understandability, empathy-building, and technically educating. Right now they feel like first drafts where each sentence stops short of more explanation for the sake of keeping them short. However, the end result is content that isn't going to be useful to anyone without a clear vision and going further into some of the explanations. I'm happy to help with writing but right now I'm really hoping this can have more revisions. Thanks for the hard work thus far, I hope my comments are received well!
Lisa Seeman-Horwitz Coga feel we need time to do a full review, and collect comments. Coga does not feel comfortable with it as it stands. Our members will struggle to find the content (we all missed parts) and comment on it.
COGA has strong concerns about this content. we also have some issues about findability and structure. see https://www.w3.org/2021/12/16-coga-minutes.html and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1swkJVhcw60QuLJEOFgRtNHh5SVhJYlPPH8N4XBEG3Bc/edit#heading=h.nqqrx1yu1uw7 for summary of our initial respoces


More details on responses

  • Laura Keen: last responded on 8, December 2021 at 19:59 (UTC)
  • Kris Anne Kinney: last responded on 10, December 2021 at 18:14 (UTC)
  • Kimberly Patch: last responded on 10, December 2021 at 20:27 (UTC)
  • Vicki Menezes Miller: last responded on 14, December 2021 at 15:56 (UTC)
  • Carlos Duarte: last responded on 14, December 2021 at 19:24 (UTC)
  • Jennifer Chadwick: last responded on 14, December 2021 at 21:30 (UTC)
  • Julie Rawe: last responded on 14, December 2021 at 21:55 (UTC)
  • Sharron Rush: last responded on 15, December 2021 at 01:59 (UTC)
  • Shawn Lawton Henry: last responded on 15, December 2021 at 03:20 (UTC)
  • Sylvie Duchateau: last responded on 16, December 2021 at 16:08 (UTC)
  • Michele Williams: last responded on 31, December 2021 at 19:55 (UTC)
  • Lisa Seeman-Horwitz: last responded on 4, January 2022 at 17:43 (UTC)

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