[Bug 9739] New: Editorial review from timeless on March 24, 2010

http://www.w3.org/Bugs/Public/show_bug.cgi?id=9739

           Summary: Editorial review from timeless on March 24, 2010
           Product: WebAppsWG
           Version: unspecified
          Platform: All
               URL: http://krijnhoetmer.nl/irc-logs/webapps/20100324
        OS/Version: All
            Status: NEW
          Keywords: editorial
          Severity: normal
          Priority: P2
         Component: WebSimpleDB
        AssignedTo: eliotgra@microsoft.com
        ReportedBy: nikunj.mehta@oracle.com
         QAContact: member-webapi-cvs@w3.org
                CC: mike@w3.org, public-webapps@w3.org


so, i had trouble following the last part
'the key applicable for some index that references that object store'
i don't see how that precise thing actually gives me the right individual
record
it maybe be 'some applicable key for an index that references it in its object
store'
but i'm not sure
> A key range is a continuous interval over some data type used for keys.
can you write 'some key <ref>data type</ref>' ?
> A key range may be left-bounded or right-bounded if there is a value that is, respectively, smaller than or larger than all its elements.
i think less/greater, but i'm not certain
(it's midnight, i'm exhausted, and sick, and have a headache)
> A key range is said to be bounded if it is both left- and right-bounded and unbounded otherwise.
'otherwise unbounded'
> A valid key range must be either half-bounded or bounded.
i don't think you've defined 'half-bounded'
> The storage operations are performed on the underlying index or an object store.
I think you can omit 'The'
> A cursor comprises a range of records in either an index or an object store. A cursor maintains a position over this series, which moves in a direction that is either monotonically increasing or decreasing order of the record keys.
you start by talking about a 'range' and then switch to a 'series'
> If the scope is static, it can cover either all the object stores and indexes in a database or it may include a subset of them.
… and if it's dynamic?
> A connection may have at most one transaction at any given time.
i think you need a word before 'at'
something like 'open' or 'running' or 'active'
> Moreover, there may not be any overlap among the scopes of all open connections to a given database.
this is confusing
if scopes are limited to transactions, then i think it'd be better to say
'among the scope of all (active?) transactions to a given database'
or perhaps scopes
> Conforming user agents may terminate transactions that take too long to complete in order to free up storage resources that are locked by a long running transaction.
the may is interesting, as a useragent, i'd be tempted to terminate
transactions that take too much ram :)
> 3.2.1 Opening the database
should it be 'a' ?
> The steps for opening a database are as follows.
the first thing that follows isn't a step
> These steps must be run with an origin, a database name and description.
drop 'a' from before 'database', or add 'a' before 'description'
> All the steps must be run atomically:
drop 'the'?
note that i'm not sure what 'All' means here
does it mean that each step is atomic, or the effect of the entire set of steps
is atomic?
> If there is already a database with the given name from the origin origin
origin origin :(
> 3.2.2 Object Store Storage steps
3.2.1 didn't include 'steps', why does 3.2.2?
> These steps must be run with four parameters: the object store, a value, an optional key, and an optional no-overwrite flag.
'must'/'four' seems odd given that two are optional
> If store uses out-of-line keys but no key generator, then a key must be passed to these steps. If not, terminate these steps and set error code DATA_ERR.
i think it'd rather this be one if condition If (store.uses(out_of_line_keys) &
!store.has_(key_generator) & !key) then terminate(…)
> If store uses in-line keys, then let key be the property of object at store's key path.
what happens if 'key' was an argument?
> Using store's key generator, produce the next key and store it as key.
i'd avoid using the phrase 'store it'
> If store uses in-line keys, then store key as the property value for object at store's key path.
using 'store' 3 times in a sentence with sometimes different meanings is really
confusing :(
> If any indexes are auto-populated for store, then store a record in that index according to index maintenance conditions.
'any indexes' is plural

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Received on Friday, 14 May 2010 22:14:22 UTC